Yesterday Keshav came to me saying he need some help with his math problem. I was walking with my dinner plate to sit down. While I was attempting to listen to what he is saying, he paused and said, “I will wait until you settle down” (I was happy inside with his courtesy)

Once I sat down, I asked him to read out the problem.

K: Gabriella is x years old.

A: pause please, and write down the equation: G’s age = x

I sighed to continue

K: His sister Felicia is 6 years older to Gabriella.

A: Pause again and put the next equation

Keshav got it and wrote, F’s age = x +6

K: Mom is twice the age of Felicia

K paused and wrote down with little of my help: M’s age = 2(x+6)

K: Aunt Tanya is x years older to Mom

K paused and asked, now what is Aunt’s age

I: 2(x+6) + x

K:  how?? I don’t get it

I: let’s go over again from the beginning, and we quickly went over the steps…

Gabriella age = x

Felicia’s age = x + 6

Mom is twice as old as Felicia, so Mom’s age is 2 (x+6)

Aunt Tanya is x years older to Mom. So, her age is mom’s age, 2(x+6) + x

K’s pitch rose, + 6, how??I don’t get it

I said not 6, x, 2(x+6) + x

K said, “you said 6 and not x)”, and he walked off madly

2 mins later, he came back with a smile

“Mom, I am sorry for being rude. These days my listening is not so good. I heard your x as 6.”

A: I could have said it wrongly too, even though I was thinking in my head, Aunt’s age is 2(x+6) + x, I might have said plus 6 at the end

It sometimes happens to me that I think of Luke in my head but say Brandon…

Keshav smiled, and said, “I know mom, it happens to me too.”

“Anyways I am sorry for being rude to you, when you were trying to help me.”

Thank you Keshav for your understanding, that I am trying to help you.

An eleven-year-old realizing and confessing sorry for he being rude, and especially saying, “when you were trying to help me”…I think is a powerful good feeling!!

Kids may not always get us, or may not be always respectful to us, but they do emulate us!!

Thank you to each of my Chinmaya Study Group members who emphasized this week to practice “active listening” to our children. I believe it makes our interactions way richer and gratifying!! Not only with children, I believe giving undivided attention and truly listening to any person we are interacting with can make the conversation more fulfilling. Would you like to share your story about the positive effects of active listening?